Random Thoughts

Sorry I haven't been posting much lately. I just haven't really been in the mood to write out how I've been feeling. I'm still struggling with cutting. It's getting more and more frustrating as time goes on. I had a friend explain Theophostic prayer to me the other day and it's sounding like it'd be really good. Fr. Mike actually said something to me about it during our first session of spiritual direction. The biggest question on my heart lately has been why I'm still struggling with cutting. It's been almost 2 years. I've seen 4 counselors, and nothing's changed. I don't know. I'm just ready to quit trying to stop and just accept that I can't stop. I don't want to do that, but I'm so sick of trying and failing. Here's a song that's kept me going lately and reminded me that no matter what the season is, God is still God and I have a reason to praise Him.




This is my prayer in the desert
And all that's within me feels dry
This is my prayer in the hunger in me
My God is a God who provides

And this is my prayer in the fire
In weakness or trial or pain
There is a faith proved
Of more worth than gold
So refine me Lord through the flames

And I will bring praise
I will bring praise
No weapon forged against me shall remain

I will rejoice
I will declare
God is my victory and He is here

And this is my prayer in the battle
And triumph is still on it's way
I am a conqueror and co-heir with Christ
So firm on His promise I'll stand

All of my life
In every season
You are still God
I have a reason to sing
I have a reason to worship

This is my prayer in the harvest
When favor and providence flow
I know I'm filled to be empited again
The seed I've recieved I will sow