Seeing Fr. Greg

So the weekend in DC was incredible. On Thursday evening, Fr. Greg met us for dinner. It was so good to see him! That was the first time I'd seen him in a year and a half. Then on Friday, me and 6 of my friends went to George Washington University to go to Mass at the Newman Club where Fr. Greg is the chaplain. Joey, Martha, and I were staying in northern Virginia while Josh, Mel, Katherine, and Linda were staying at Josh's house in Maryland. Joey, Martha, and I left for DC on the Metro and got to GWU at about 11. We found the Newman Center and went in. Fr. Greg came downstairs, showed us around, etc. He went back upstairs to his office for a few minutes and then he called me from his office to come upstairs. As I was walking up the stairs, I was just thinking, "What the heck could he want?" I walked into his office and he asked me to sit down. Then he said "Remember when I prayed over you at St. Andrew's? Well, let's do it again." So he put his hands on my head and started praying for healing and that I would know how much I mean to so many people, including him. Then, he took my arm, placed his hands on the scars. He prayed for both emotional and physical healing. I could feel his hands shaking. I know he was praying extremely intensely. Then he took my hands and asked God that I only do good with my hands and no longer abuse my body. He then placed his hands back on my head and continued to pray. Then, when he was finished, he blessed me with healing water from Lourdes. After that, he say down and we talked for a few minutes. He told me I was a good kid and that I have to accept God's love. I explained to him how I'm trying to, but I'm too stubborn. He told me to pray for humility, which I already do. Then we both stood up and he hugged me. It was the longest hug ever. It was literally 5 minutes long. He said I was a good kid. I didn't really respond and he said "You don't believe me, do you?" I said I didn't and he said that he wished I could accept that. He said that I could understand how much both he and God love me. I told him that I was going to start crying. Fr. Greg said, in the most loving tone I've ever heard come out of a man's mouth, "That'd be okay." So then and there, I completely lost it. I started bawling in his arms. He just held me. I finally stopped crying and he said, "Catherine, I love you. I so strongly wish you understood that."

When Fr. Greg hugged me, that was the first time I've felt truly loved since I began cutting 20 months ago. It's like God had his hands wrapped around me. It was incredible. Well, Fr. Greg is coming to visit Steubenville at the end of the month since I got to 30 days. Today's day 40. If I can get to July 17, that will be the longest I've ever gone. I'm thanking God for the incredible weekend me and my friends had in DC. It was so blessed!